I woke early this morning, unsettled and thinking of my daughters... and about how excited I had been about being with them for Christmas. I KNOW, we will be with them soon, but for today, I am dealing with a deep pain in my heart as I long to be with with our daughters. I did everything in my human ability to assist in moving this process along and it was not enough. I can not do all things on my own.... a lesson I have repeatedly learned and leaned into in this process, has once again been confirmed.
Calling the national this and the national that and speaking to people on the other end, who have no sense of urgency, does not help.
I have revisited the day we learned that we were parents to these two AMAZING girls. I can not help but recall the JOY, the JOY of hearing Julissa's voice on her 12th birthday, the JOY others have offered through prayers, thoughts, and gifts. So much JOY to know and experience today. It is in my head and in my heart, but today I am struggling with experiencing JOY, because sadness crept up.
And then I am reminded of the words of a man whom I admire greatly, a man who died just one year ago traveling home to his family (several of whom he became daddy to through the miracle of adoption) after being at a training to help fight human trafficking, Derek Loux.
My friends, adoption is redemption. It’s costly, exhausting, expensive, and outrageous. Buying back lives costs so much. When God set out to redeem us, it killed Him.”
