Seven Hundred Nintey Six Days

796 days ago we sent our application to our adoption agency to bring home our 2 daughters from the Peru Waiting Angels Program.  We were told it would be 12-18 months depending on how long our homestudy and the dossier took to be processed.  Twelve (12) months quickly came and went, but 18 months looked promising.  The possibilities of things that could go wrong DID go wrong. Delay turned into redo turned into error turned into unknown, you get the picture.  We just wanted things remedied, we wanted our daughters home.  We didn’t understand, we couldn’t understand and yet we desperately wanted to understand.  Why? When? What? Where? Who? We learned that agencies are just that, an agency.  They have a role to play, but they are not the ultimate, they are a business, they have images to uphold and bills to pay.  One agencies concern in granting a favorable homestudy to a married couple considered by a non married Social Worker to be minorities, because we chose to adopt and older children, proved not to be our first and final hurdle on this journey.  She believed adoption to be a way to grow your family when traditional means were exhausted or as an afterthought.  So although we shared we had a heart for older children, she would not “approve us” and her reason, we had never parented before.  Silly silly SW, no first time parents have ever parented before.  Although initially we were relieved with an approved homestudy up to the age of eight, our hearts were not settled.  We chose our adoption agency based on the Waiting Angels program. We wanted to become a forever family with a sister sibling group whose statistics were not in their favor.  It became more and more apparent that we needed to pursue our initial desire.  It was then that we found Julissa and Johanna.  We changed homestudy agencies and our lovely Social Worker was thrilled to increase our age.  She had no concerns and expedited our updated homestudy to get our immigration paperwork updated.    The process to officially becoming matched with them and the final immigration process happened in record time. Until the last moment when a typo was discovered.  The time from when we found our daughters, updated our immigration paperwork, requested our daughters, approved by the Peruvian government and made it back through immigration was done in record time.  

In the 12-18 months we were told that it would take to complete our adoption our daughters were waiting for the process to be completed to become Waiting Angels.  It was when we found them and knew they were our daughters that we pursued the age increase.  THESE WERE THE GIRLS that we initially desired to become a forever family with and we knew they were our daughters.  It took us 23 months to be united on paper, and now at 26 months and 1 day we will fly to Peru to hear the day we will united forever as a family. 

Unexpected Blessings

During these past few days, Tracy and I have been showered with encouragement from so many different directions. While the adoption journey can be a lonely one- and our process has felt like that on so many levels- today, we feel loved, supported and rallied around. What makes it even better, is that this is coming from unexpected places.

So, this is to say thank you!

Over the past few days, both Tracy and I have received numerous e-mails, FB messages, and texts from old friends, new friends, and people we don’t even know- all filled with encouraging words.

Notes like: “I don’t actually know either of you, but I have been following your story and I am so happy that you are getting closer to being with your girls” to “I know we haven’t seen each other in 20 years, but I have been following your adoption journey and praying for you” become balm for our souls, soothing the ache of our emotional muscles, which feel sore from a long, difficult journey.

It also reminds us that God’s provision can come (or perhaps usually comes) in ways that we would least expect. There were a lot of ways that Tracy and I simply assumed that we’d be supported and encouraged, that didn’t happen. Yet, God provided in ways that were far better: things like missionaries we’ve never met offering to host us in their home, travelers willing to pick us up at the airport, an anonymous gift card for the first batch of post-adoption groceries being put in the offering at church, an old friend sending Christmas gifts to give to the girls, people from our small group faithfully praying with and for us each week, developing an amazing community and support system with other families adopting from Peru, and the list goes on! Now that we stand on the far side of the process, we’re happy that God chose to meet our needs in the unexpected ways versus the traditional ones that are often taken for granted.

We’re deeply thankful for all of you who have reached out to us, and just want to let you know how much your notes and e-mails mean to us: especially those of you whom we don’t even know and who have become part of the unexpected blessings of our process. (And if we haven't heard from you yet, we'd love to!)

-Ben

100th POST

I did not time it this way but our 100th post is EXCITING!  We booked our tickets to PERU late last evening.  ALL necessary adoption documents are in Lima.  Translation is being done on the birth certificate and related documents form Spanish to English so they can delivered to the US Embassy where our official invite to travel will be issued.

Flights need to be booked 7 days in advance and additionally the day they are booked MATTERS!  After much research over the last 4 months and conversation with our travel agent, tickets were slated to increase by over $400.00 a piece for round trip tickets and the high price of one way tickets, which are even more than our round trip tickets were astounding!  Once the invite is generated nothing holds us back from being united with our daughters.  To wait another 7 days plus the best day to purchase is NOT a reason to delay this union any longer.  After much consideration, prayer, pros and cons, scheduling these flights a week out, and taking people at their word to do what they have said could and would happen we made the BEST decision we could.

We talked to the girls yesterday afternoon to tell them the all the necessary papers were collected and that it would just be a little bit longer. Our sweet Julissa tried her best to pin us to an exact date and time!  She was very talkative and interactive with us and had some very mature questions for us.  Our little Johanna was asking Julissa when we were coming before she even had a chance to get on the phone.  They are eager, they are ready, they are anxious and yet they are holding onto HOPE. 

We are almost there.  Thank you again and again to all of you who have been on this journey with us and those of you who have joined us along the way.  We are so thankful for the love and support we have received.  What an incredible blessing you have been to us.

Words?

We have few words this week as we were hopeful that last week was the week.  As Monday turned to Tuesday and Tuesday turned to Wednesday we were in disbelief.  Our updates are scarce from our agency.  We have stopped emailing and calling as we have found it unhelpful and frustrating.  They function on the belief that international adoption is full of unknowns and delays and are very comfortable with this premise.  We did receive an update on Thursday afternoon that the notary did process the note to the civil registrar to correct the birth certificate.  She has not yet generated the new birth certificate which needs to be sent to the Embassy so that we can travel.  So here is to tomorrow where the birth certificate is generated and bussed to Lima for translation and delivered to the Embassy.  Continued prayers are appreciated!

Bad Space

A post from Ben....

It’s hard to describe this last week that Tracy and I have had, apart from the term “bad space”. It’s been a hard week for us, especially considering we had hoped that this would be a week of celebration, and perhaps even travel plans. But tonight, as we view the long, 3-day weekend ahead of us, the mood is “down”.

As those who follow us know, last Thursday (or by some counts, Friday) was the last day of our mandatory 10 day wait to have our oldest daughter’s birth certificate corrected. We had our hopes up (something I don’t advise people to do) that everyone would be motivated to get the birth certificate corrected, translated, and off to the US Embassy. But, it seems that’s not the case.

On Monday, the director of the orphanage, who’s signature was required to get the birth certificate fixed, thought it higher priority to take a bunch of the girls for a day-long picnic than to go sign the document that’s key to the adoption of two of them. A promise of “do it tomorrow” didn’t work out, as on Tuesday she was called into a meeting which prevented her from going. On Wednesday, she was finally able to go and sign it, but instead of her signature resulting in something tangible as we had believed, it simply resulted in a promise that the all-important-document would be done in a few days.  The week was extremely frustrating; day-in-day-out waiting for some good news. Frustrated that our agency in the US is reactive in nature, instead of proactive as we had anticipated they would be, and we have been especially frustrated that even the people on the ground, closest to the girls, can be so lackadaisical in the way they work towards a resolution. It hasn’t been an easy chapter for us, as we sit and wait.

At the end of the day Friday, our agency wrote to us and told us that the most recent update is that perhaps a new birth certificate will be issued on Monday or Tuesday. Sure, it’s good news- technically, but we’re not getting our hopes up. They warned us the other day to be prepared for the “great possibility” of more delays, which isn’t what we need to hear right now.  This last part of the process has been as unbearable as a sunburn that begins to itch so bad that it drives you to insanity.  We just don’t know how many more phone calls we can bear that start of with “hey guys… we have more bad news…” Something’s gotta give, as they say.

But, as a former president used to say, we are “cautiously optimistic” if for no other reason than we can’t quite think of any more areas that could go wrong. If all goes as plan, a new birth certificate will be issued at the beginning of the week and will be sent to Lima for translation, certification from the Peruvian government (that the change was done legally), and then submission to the US Embassy.  We have no idea how long of a process that might be—realistically, it should only take a few days at most, but nothing ever seems to go as planned. So, here’s how you can pray for us:

-       Please pray that we’ll start to feel encouraged, and find our strength again. We just feel so zapped by this last month.

-       Pray that we’ll remember that it’s ultimately God’s job to get all this done. We’ve lost confidence in most of the people actually involved, and need to remember that we need to put our confidence in Him.

-       Pray that the Civil Registrar will actually do this on Monday and not delay in producing the new birth certificate

-       Pray that the new certificate would quickly arrive in Lima, and that the translation and certification process would be quick and without error.

-       Finally, please pray that the US Embassy would accept the new packet when turned in and that we would receive the “Article 5”, on the spot. We had been told by our agency that the article 5 process could take a week, but from talking with many of you these past few weeks we realized that many of the other adoption agencies are receiving their Article 5 letters on the spot, the same day simply because they ask for it the same day, and wait for it to be issued so that it can be hand-walked to the SNA (the last step of the process). So, we KNOW that all of this can be done in one day, but need people to pray that it will be the case for us.     

Something Fun In the Waiting

Look what Papa made his princesses.  Corey Pro Photography shirts.  He is so excited to give these to his girls.  They have no idea how much their Papa loves to take pictures and that we will have hundreds before we even make home.  You are loved J &J.

Quick Update

Thursday was suppose to be day 10, we received an email on Friday that informed us that Friday was day 10.  The email also told us that Monday was the first day anything could be done.  We were expecting to hear from our SW by the end of today.  NOTHING!  We are still hopeful that the notary wrote her note today and that the orphanage director will sign and take it to the civil registrar and put on the bus to Lima tomorrow.  We are also hopeful that we will hear from our agency will an update. 

We will not be calling the girls until we can tell them when we are coming.  The last call was hard for them, especially our oldest, and we do not want our calls with no answers to be a defining point in the beginning of  our relationship. 

Stay tuned.  I PROMISE to share with our faithful followers as soon as we know. 

Keep praying!

Tomorrow

I had to pause as I considered how to describe Thursday, February 10th 2011.  The words almost there, the last day, tomorrow, or the end, all are true descriptors of this date and event in some fashion.  It is the 10th business day of the official posting being completed.  Now the notary, civil registrar, Orphanage Director, letter from Dr C, Birth Certificate's bus ride from Chincha to Lima, and the US Embassy.  Oh and throw in 2 overnight translations.  Three (3) times is a charm is what some people say.  I am hopefully optomistic that the birth certificate will be corrected and we will be invited to travel.  Our daughters are waiting and we want nothing more than to be with them, to end the waiting, to scoop them up and fulfill our first promise.  Have I mentioned how worth it these two (2) girls are?  Words are not adequate and I can only IMAGINE what it will be like to be united as a family. 

Thank you for joining us in prayer.  It is REAL!  I have felt the prayers and been encouraged to lean into God's promises like NEVER before.  I do not want to paint a pretty picture that it has been easy or without a range of emotions.  I desire to be real in a way that is honest yet encouraging to anyone who might consider adoption.  I will say again that I knew at the beginning of this journey I was going to be stretched and changed in ways I never knew possible.  I was ready, open and inviting it.  I knew I had no idea what it would look like, feel like or be like!  It has been an INCREDIBLE journey thus far.  Yes even with the heartache and challenges.  I have been stretched, changed and grown in ways that I was certain would never happen! I will not for one minute lead anyone to believe it has been easy, but worth it, YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT!  During this latest challenge and waiting there have been days when it was hard to catch my breath.  I felt depleted and wondered how "I" was going to make things happen.  I could see that my body was physically whole yet I felt like I was in hundreds of tiny pieces held together by an invisible thread.  The feeling was so surreal (like a disconnect) and it is only today that I have the words to describe what it is that I have experienced.  It comes to me today that the invisible thread was/is God holding me together.  That "I" have been invited to believe and embrace the promises that His strength is perfect. I literally can breath a little easier, feeling like I am connected, like those hundreds of tiny pieces are not about to shatter, I am whole.  Another reminder that my HOPE is secure and He is all I need. 

God, you know the emotions involved and each of our hearts.  You know and see the whole picture.  My tiny perspective is just that, and it makes living it out RAW, raw to the core.  We are trusting you with the details that we can not fathom, that do not make sense to us or others, that no words can provide comfort for.  Our hearts are even more ready to be united, to begin the bonding, to build trust and grow in our unique individual and family relationships, to nurture, to love, and to teach!  I can ONLY IMAGINE what you have in store.  I am confident that it is far more than I could ever imagine. Thank you for making much of this journey to our two AMAZING daughters, stretching me, changing me and growing me in ways I was certain would never happen. 


So the wait is almost over and we look forward to sharing the WE FLY news that I had so anticipated sharing in December..........  We are so thankful for those who have been with us on this journey and others who have joined us along the way. 

Perspective

It is so hard to find perspective when you are 3700+ miles away from your daughters.  We are thankful for the opportunity to call them.  They like it and it is helpful for them.  We are happy to call them and remind them that we are here, wanting more than anything to grant their wishes.  Today it was hard for them to hear, but more than that they were sad.  They were quiet after they told us they miss us, they love us and they want us there right NOW!  HEARTACHE!  More than anything we want to be with them right now, give them an answer to when we are coming, give them what they want. My baby girl just calls out to me Mama, Mama, I love you you. 

To understand the bigger picture. To know that this sadness will be forgotten when we are together.  Perspective. 

Day 10 is on Feb 10th and the Orphanage Director needs to go to the notary to write the note for the civil register to make a new birth certificate (she has 5 days) and the then to Dr C to write a letter to the embassy that the process to correct the birth certificate was done legally.

PRAYER REQUEST: Orphanage Director, Notary, Civil Register, Dr C and Embassy.  That all these individuals find it in their hearts to MOVE. THOSE. DOCUMENTS. MUY RAPIDO!!!!!