My Husband is AMAZING!!!!

We are DONE with all that is required to make it into the states. We had our embassy doctor appt that took over 5 hours of waiting and two separate appts that were 5 minutes a piece, yesterday. Today we took all those documents to the US Embassy this morning and had our appointment with the consulate who approved the girls visas today. Ben will return tomorrow to pick up the actual documents!!!!!! Exciting this part is OVER! At the moment I am celebrating moments that can be tonight.

We are flying out Saturday night, flying all night, landing in Atlanta, where the girls will become American Citizens.

Now for my hubby who is AMAZING! I am so thankful that I am on this journey with him. Ben has been amazing with the girls and even more impressive with me. The girls prefer him. This is not uncommon. As a woman I represent caregivers who they left behind. I represent the figure that abandon them. I represent all the was hurtful and all that was comforting. I have a very conflicting role. As for Ben he is new and he is funny and he doesn't have any negative or comforting roles. I have been managing and reminding myself that it is not personal. Over time it takes it toll. Today I broke down. I am emotionally, physically, and mentally exhausted. Today I fell even more in love with Ben as he stepped in to encourage me, support me, remind me and love on me as the tears flowed and flowed. He has been incredible this whole time but today he was everything I think every woman dreams her man will be. Ok I'll stop but it's the best way I know how to describe how wonderful he is and has been.

Thank you for your love, support and prayers.

Our Journey Continues

Well its been a difficult few days. I started a post yesterday but was not certain of what I wanted to share. I began the blog as a way to connect with others adopting in Peru, in general, and to share authentically what this journey is all about. I knew that when we were finally united with our daughters that I would share our experiences but want to respect our daughters stories, and who they are at this present time. This is a balance and sometimes the line is fine. Yesterday was one of those days that my emotions were high, I am exhausted and yet wisdom said what seems fine now you may regret later, so I opted not to post. I believe that it is important to share my thought process as I desire to be real about the journey and yet at times it is just to much to share.

We had a rough weekend and then had to leave early Monday morning to travel all day. We traveled some more to pick up our daughter from our wonderful friend Brenda and then had a rough evening and morning. We were not sure we would make our final appointment with the SNA. We made it. No, I didn't say it was easy. Yes we encountered a very rude psychologist who proceeded to tell me I needed to learn Spanish and be more flexible and tolerant. She continued to speak to me in Spanish knowing I did not speak Spanish and after our request to wait for our rep to return. It was very unpleasant and we were not pleased, but we tended to business and once again voiced our intentions. Off to the Peruvian Embassy where we got our daughters Peruvian Passports.

Next step US Embassy for the girls doctor appointment to clear them for good health for the final piece of their visas. We are scheduled to fly out Saturday night late and arrive in Boston in the early afternoon on Sunday. We are so thankful for the continued support, love ad prayers. The emails, facebook comments, and the time so many of you have taken to share a word of encouragement, check in, share your experience or to remind us you are with us. Don't underestimate the gift you are giving to us.

Tonight we are sitting here with our daughters sharing pleasant conversation, watching tele, and exchanging Spanish-English conversions. We recognize our daughters are grieving and testing our limits. We are doing our best to demonstate and teach them what love, family, and life outside of an institution really is. We see glimpses of hope and celebrate them. Tonight my spirit is calm, while my heart breaks that our daughters and millions of others have and continue to live the life of an orphan.

Not Holding Out On Paige

Sorry for no post, I am not holding out on Paige, much to her surprise. As I sit here to write I am also praying that this will be my last Saturday post from Peru. We love Peru and the people, but we are ready to be in our own home where we can create our new normal. Where we are familiar and can provide the girls with structure and routine.

It sure was nice to have my dad and sister here. It helped the girls gain a better sense of what a family offers and more people who love them. We spent yesterday afternoon talking about music and artist. Julissa knows a lot about music and artist. We had a great time laughing about her thoughts on Michael Jackson and other artist. Then last evening we talked about Christmas and music and the girls had Mama, Papi, Tia Tarsha, and even abuelo singing Christmas songs and sharing stories of what Christmas is like here in Peru and in the US. They loved it.

The girls love to pose on their terms for pictures, but when asked or for a snapshot they turn their heads. So we have been short on photos and we have a very sad photographer/Papi on our hands.

We are traveling on Monday to get the girls birth certificates in two locations. We are so greatful for Brenda Foss who has once again seen our need and has offered to help us. THANK YOU is not enough.

On Tuesday we go back to the SNA and sign our post adoption agreement and to Peru Migration for the girls Peruvian Passports. On Wednesday we have embassy doctor appts. and Thursday the consulate appt. (this must happen on Thursday) and on Friday we will get their American Visas and we will fly out late that night. Prayers are appreciated for this last week to go exactly as planned so that we can fly out on Friday as planned.

Hopeful to be in Boston next Saturday afternoon.

Abuelo & Tia

Oh how great it has been to have abuelo (grandfather) and tia here with us this week.  The girls are really enjoying all the ice cream from abuelo.  They LOVE ice cream and abuelo LOVES to buy it for them and here our little say sank you!  He laughs every time like its the first time he has heard it.  Just like a little himself.  Abuelo has also taken to giving his coins as this truly pleases the girls.  They count their money and lock it in the safe above their bed.  Before they go to bed they take it out, count it, lock it up.  Before we leave, take it out, count it, bring it along.  We return they count it and lock it back up!

Today Papi's socks had hit rock bottom in the smell department.  Before I knew it our little had him in the bathroom to hand wash his socks.  Well, she was disgusted by his lack of skill, demonstrated and well just did it herself.  Papi left the bathroom and soon she came bounding out and said, "clean socks, that will be 2 soles"  We all broke out in laughter and amazement, as those nasty black socks were white and clean.  She got her 2 soles and then proceeded to ask Papi to wash her socks.  Back in the bathroom where she basically did it herself as she assisted him and she paid him .10 soles.  I think we have a little business girl on our hands.

Last night we went to the water fountains and had a great time.  I will let these pictures tell you the story.

Introducing The Corey Girls

We signed the adoption resolution today.  It was uneventful really.  We waited and waited, we were handed a document in Spanish and told to check out names and passport numbers and sign.  The girls waited in the waiting room outside of the room.  We waited some more and left.  Nothing that felt official or even acknowledged.  However, we were relieved by the fact that this was a monumental step for the future.

We had planned to celebrate tonight at the Lima Water Park.  We survived the crazy taxi ride over to discover the hours have changed and they are not opened on Mondays and Tuesdays.  So we will go again tomorrow night.

It has been great to have my sister Tarsha and father here.  They are a great addition to the mix and the girls appreciate tia Tarsha's crazy singing and ideas.  She was even able to convince them to go to the markets shopping for a bit today.  Now thats no babystep thats a GIANT step.

We are hoping that our rep can attain power of attorney to sign for both certificates.  Apparently there  is a clause for civil registrars, specifically for adoptions, that permits this with a notary.  Hoping she pursues this with tenacity so the girls don't have to travel to these locations.

Wednesday is an administrative day called the Day of Silience, so nothing happens, on Thursday the paperwork for the new birth certificates will be submitted.  One will be ready by Friday and the other on Monday.  Then to the US Embassy for their Visas.  When these are ready we can return to the US.

Wish we had pictures from today, but we don't.

Prayers Answered

We are so thankful for all the prayers and well wishes. We are completing family placement phase today and we sign the adoption resolution tomorrow (Tuesday).  Wednesday is the day of silence and Thursday papers are sent to the birth ctiy/town and we are praying that both girls birth certificates will be ready for signing to their new names on Friday. We really need this to happen overnight so that we do not have to travel to these very sensitive locations with the girls on Monday. If we can sign on Friday the girls can stay with Papa and tia Tarsha. This is a big deal for the girls to not go. Our in country rep wants us to leave them with a stranger who speaks Spanish if we need to go on Monday. I disagree, it goes against everything we know to be healthy bonding. Continued prayer for favor for the birth certificates to be completed overnight.

SNA arrived while we were eating breakfast and joined us after we were done.  Both girls were excited to report on their weekend outings, playing softball, hockey and even a little basketball.  Of course the water park and the fact that we went with family and friends.  I found this very interesting.  It is hard for me to follow all conversations with the powers that be as our rep only translates what she thinks is important and so I am always behind on the conversation and asking for translation.  In any event I was able to catch this and found this to be encouraging.

Tonight we had dinner with our missionary friends and both girls rode bikes and loved it.  Tomorrow night we will be at the Lima Water Park.  This park is full of colorful fountains that are lit up and apparently very amazing.  This will be a celebratory evening.  Happy to have family to celebrate with on this day.

We continue to see progress with both girls. Baby steps, they are so important to celebrate, even when they are don't give us he warm fuzzies.

Stay tuned, we are hours away from introducing Julissa & Johanna Corey!

Water Slides with Friends and Family

Papa and Tia Tarsha arrived just after 10:30 last night and both girls were still awake anticipating their arrival.  We did introductions and visited briefly before calling it a very late night!
We woke up earlier than usual today in anticipation of our outing to the water slides with the Foss family.  We have been so blessed by them as they have come along side us here in Peru to help us show the girls what families do, what families look like, and developing new friends along the way. Thank you Tyler, Brenda, Hannah, Sarah, and Myah. 

We had traditional Peruvian food. As we ate I had the favorite dish of both of my friends Jennifer and Paige on either side of me.  Wish my brain could think of it's official name, but it is steak tips and onion salad over french fries. It made me smile. Ben, Tarsha and my dad all enjoyed it too. I ordered some yuka and Julissa ate most of it dipped in a yellow sauce. Brenda is going to give the name and we are going to chat with Maria (our peruvian cooking teaching and now friend) about giving us some tips on more Peruvian dishes. 

Things continue to go well. Wish we had flies on our walls. It seems as though since our last meeting when our big was told everything was normal and continuing was in fact a good call. She has been calm, playful, fairly peaceful and continues to ask more questions about the US. Tonight we skyped with Tia Tarsha's friend and her children. She is from Colombia and the girls share similar features. They conversed in a fluent Spanish conversation and discussed school and a few other things. Thank you Angie and Amanda. 

We continue to experience the comfort of all the prayers from people known, unknown, near and and far. I wish I had the words to describe the peace we have in the midst of all that is transpiring. To be with our daughters is a gift each day. We love them and we recognize that children from hard places do not know how to trust, experience love, or comprehend how loved and treasured they are.  

Don't stop praying, we have a meeting in the morning and we are hopeful that coming off this weekend our big will have just a little more to ponder. She has a quick and hard shell, but is so very tender just beneath the surface. Praying that SNA experiences her tenderness and has compassion for her for the responsibility that has been placed on her. 

Enjoy the few pics we captured today. I will post as soon as I can with an update tomorrow. 

Love The Corey's, Ben, Tracy, Julissa and Johanna.

Missionaries & McDonald's

We find ourselves steady on an otherwise emotional roller coasters.  We appreciate all of you that are praying and asking others to join you on our families behalf.  We know that our strength is not our owns as we are both experiencing peace in this time of great turmoil.  No other way to explain our hearts.

We continue to see our daughter gravitate toward us through physical touch and testing limits.  She really has a great time with her Papa.  She loves to get his attention and interact with him.  She "finds" ways to be close in proximity as they chat, play a game or watch tele. As for me, well I am the figure, the representative of the source of abandonment and great rejection.  In addition, females are not novelties to children as oftentimes the caretakers are women.  It is a joy to watch her with Ben and I am really ok.  Sure I would like for her to want me to care for her, but this is not about me, this is about my daughter, who needs time to heal.  I knew this, I was prepared that this could be the case.  Sure along this journey I secretly found myself hoping a few times that my daughter would be unscathed and want me, but I quickly did a reality check, orphans are not left unscathed and keeping my own needs and wants is a must.  I appreciate the few moments I am given and value the risk that these moments pose for her.  Babysteps, babysteps, and that is what we are seeing. Thank you God!

About an hour after posting yesterday we saw a changing heart. We had a great afternoon and evening.  We were invited to play softball today by some wonderful missionaries.  Brenda found my blog and reached out to me back in December.  We have maintained contact and she and her family have been a huge BLESSING to our family during this critical time. The invite brought about the need for sneakers and Brenda was so kind as to come and pick us up and take us shopping for sneakers and to dinner.  We watched Julissa as she hit some balls in warm up before the mens softball game and let me tell you.... this is one talented girl.  Everyone was in shock that a peruvian knew how to play softball.  Her stance was perfect, she stepped into the pitch and she had those men running for balls.  She reports liking to pitch and practiced alot.  Boy can she wind up!  We learned that she came in second in the nation for her tribal dance for all of Peru.  She started asking Ben questions about the United States on Wednesday and continues to ask and gain a sense about what she can expect.  She is greatly concerned about the grade she will be in, when she will graduate high school? Will she really be able to go to college? Why everyone says going to the US is so much better?  Why so much opportunity there?  She is a listener, a ponderer, and responsible, all the while she is young, scared, poorly prepared, and being given the power to choose the future, for both her and her sister, with little to no awareness.  We are coasting through the weekend, doing whatever we need to to appease and please.  This is not what we believe about parenting.  But in the bigger picture we believe that if this is what is required as a form of advocacy for our daughters future, we will do it. We are aware that this will make transitioning home even harder, but given the choice we choose to advocate for our daughter to not be given such a great and grave responsabilty.  

We are awaiting the arrival of Papa and Tia Tarsha and a trip with Brenda and her family to the water slides tomorrow.  

I do not have much time but wanted to keep all of you updated. Thank you for staying with as as we ride out this time.  

Oh yes so our daughters went to McDonalds for the first time and both felt VERY sick after.  Hope that was a one time deal.....  

Excuse the lack of flow, just wanted to get out a quick post.  

 

Family Placement Extended

Today was day 7 of the mandatory 7 days of placement. We had our visit by the psychologist from the SNA (the powers that be) and our oldest daughter once again said she did not want to be adopted. She said she doesn't like anything about adoption. This is shared with our little one and she acts in accordance to the expectations given to her by the big. Our hearts are heavy, we are emotionally exhausted, and our thoughts are not clear. SNA says that they know we are these girls only chance, only hope of adoption, only hope for a future. But that they can not force a child into adoption, even when it is what is best for them. We were given the option to stop now and go home tomorrow, without these 2 valued lives, or to take the chance to wait out (up to 7 days) our daughters emotions. So we plead with you to join us in prayer. We do not understand, but we are trusting God for His mercy, His grace, His favor on these little lives, especially the older one, who does not know what she is rejecting for her and her sister.

I requested that the SNA call back to the orphanage and get their perspective on how the big processes scary and uncertain times. If she digs in her heels and sticks with it or if she comes around so that they would have a sense of the emotional roller coaster she is on. They confirmed that this is how she deals with difficult emotions. The administrator offered to come and talk to her, but that is out of the SNA guidelines. They are considering allowing him to cal her and talk to her. He too is saying she has wanted a family for so long and that this is our daughters only hope of a future. If the SNA were not to find this placement favorable, our daughters would be sent to yet another orphanage, and that is where both children will age out. Although they will not separate them now, they will be separated in 6 years as Julissa ages out and Johanna spends 4 years without her sister.

We remain confident that the emotions, the push and pull, and the behaviors are normal for children to experience when joining a family. IT.IS.SCARY! What we are concerned about is that a child's emotions and fear are considered lodgical and sound for such a life decision.

Our Days

Our days are long, filled with tele, music, tele, tele and well more tele. It's an escape and while we are trying to appease all parties involved we are learning more about our daughters. Those of you who know me well know I have a very keen sense of people. Those who don't know me well often press me for more information or an explanation of why I think or say what I do. I'm notnalways able to provide details at first glance but find if you wait it out with me you too willmsee what I am referencing. This happened with the psychologist at the orphanage. From our first interaction I knew she was more intersted in us and what wee could offer her than focusing on the girls. This became clearer to Ben when they were alone with the girls and she asked him to be her friend on facebook and help her find a husband. There were several instances and although there is a cultural difference in play there were other elements involved. I share this because all parties currently involved agree with us that the girls were not well prepared for what it meant to join a family. In the walls of the orphanage there is so little to do and not a lot of compromise, not a lot of reasons for adults to say no or for a child to disagree. It is all about survival so you eat when food is served, you shower when it's your turn and you take what you can get. In a family there is more freedom, more options, more intimaty, and you have to think of others needs. All that you do is not confined to four walls. Change is hard and scary for those of us who are equipped, can you imagine what it is like when the change is all unknown, unimaginable and you have received mixed messages from adults about what you can and can not do.

We are hoping that our family placement will end on Friday and that Monday we will sign the FINAL adoption papers and begin the process home. This includes returning to their birth city and the city where they lived until we became a family. Then submit to Peru for passports and then the US Embassy for their visas to the US.

Prayers for all to go as scheduled and for the US Embassy to have a rapid turn around time so that we can get to our permanent placement and provide a sense of safety.

No pictures. The few I took in the room were deleted.

What Does Bonding Look Like

As a clinician who has worked with children in therapeutic foster care and adoption, Ben has had to listen to my many rants about the overuse and misuse of the words bonding and attachment.  The benefit, he knows what to make of the interactions we have and to celebrate with me the tiny milestones in the BIG picture of our day.  See it was not all for nothing and we are stronger for it.

Bonding with an 8 and 12 (who is insistent that she is only 11, more on this later) year olds is obviously very different than bonding with an infant. As I prepared activities I kept this at the forefront of my mind.  Bonding includes physical touch and eye contact.  One activity I planned for was manicures.  I bought little manicure sets and a variety of nail polishes.  It helps that they are girly girls as I soak their little hands in warm water, rub lotion on their palms and through each finger and wash it off again with more  hot water.  As we sit face to face and paint it is constant touch with great moments of very good eye contact.  Using the language barrier to our benefit we communicate with gestures and eye movement as we demonstrate emotions.  (oh no, I got a little on your finger, do you like?, concern about a blot of polish or need for another coat, etc...).

As for Ben and the girls, it is alot of the typical rough housing, using him as a jungle gym, sitting on him, holding him back, pinching his cheeks (yup my daughters love to pinch cheeks), teasing him to get him to come to them and tickle or hug them and all over again.

We have a fair amount of mimicking occurring as well.  I speak to them in English and Ben in Spanish. The mimics are bilingual and well sometimes Spanglish.

As for the more somber moments, allowing us to comfort them, without shrinking, or pulling away.  In fact both girls are seeking us out for comfort.  (For their privacy I am not going to share details, but thankful for the the opportunities we have had in some very typical difficult moments).

So we are pleased with the progress our daughters are making.  They try new things each day and when something works for them, we see them create opportunities to do it again.

We put them to bed last evening and I started to blog when suddenly we had 2 visitors in our bed.  We looked at each other and said well, lets go with it and there they slept until 2 am. Remember, we are bonding and bonding knows no age.  When children and adults do not complete developmental stages they can only build on the foundation that has been laid.  Chronological age is meaningless and part of healing is completing developmental stages-- which means, it's important to meet them wherever they're at.

Bonding is critical to healthy attachment and so here we are taking their cues and rolling with them.  Loving them and appreciating each new glimpse into who they are. They have so much to teach us and us them and this is what makes us a family!

Photo Update

Connection can be spotty so I thought I would share while I could.  We have been room bound.  Oh to live under a microscope.

playing on their bed, to hear the laughter it is like music

Papi is a human jungle gym to our little one

We managed to leave the room and get the girls to the ocean for 10 minutes

Johanna loves to pose with silly faces and have her papi do the same.

Dancing at the goodbye party

to know what is going on inside that little mind

Family Is Scary

Tonights post will be short.  I am more than exhausted.  We have hit some bumps, that we expected, just not in the response from the the adults.  We have reached out for support and we are hopeful.  Becoming a family is scary and no child should ever have to choose if family is what they want.  No child should ever carry the weight of a decision so monumental to the future, they can not even comprehend.  With that said the bonding is going very well.  Both girls prefer us within eyeshot, although they may say otherwise, the proof is in the pudding as some would say.  My little wants me to help her change her clothes, tonight she wanted me to brush her teeth.  Even my big wants me to be there while she brushes her teeth, and put cream on her face.  But it is scary to feel like you might like something.  It is easier to do  it yourself. When the only life you have ever known is to care for yourself, the thought of big people who I call mama and papa want to care for me.  Why do adults rely on feelings?  Don't they know feelings are just that?  FEELINGS!  They are not reliable.  Why is it that input based on feelings that are so unreliable are being so weighted when the observations are that I am bonding beautifully?

This is a glimpse into our day.  We were told today that we should let the girls do as they please, no rules, no structure, they choose. We do not believe that it is in their interest, but if this is what we must do to get through the politics, we will sleep tonight with active lice. If it means doing everything we can to advocate for our daughters from life as orphans and a future of no hope.  WE WILL FIGHT for these two precious lives.  This is our heart beat and if shaving my head is what the outcome has to be, it will be.  These are not feelings, these are values and convictions and I will not journey in fear.  Thank you to those already praying.  I am doing fine.  I might crash later, but for now, I am ON MY GAME!  Those of you who know me well, and love me, know what that looks like.  I have an amazing peace, I know what and who we are fighting, and we are NOT fighting alone.

So goodnight for now and don't let the bed bugs bite (or is that head bugs bite).

What Does A Family Do?

What is so natural and normal to some families is a steep learning curve for others. Ben and I choose to grow our family through adoption. Our hearts were torn by the thought that some children go to bed at night and wake each morning never belonging to a family. As we carefully pondered our decision as to which country, we were also considering age. We chose Peru for a number of reasons, a big one being the number of Waiting Children and sibling groups. As children age their chances of adoption significantly decrease. Our daughters being older has many meanings. For Johanna the only life she has ever really known is in the orphanage. Julissa has spent nearly half of her life in the orphanage and although to us it may seem like a horrible place to grow up it is the only place my daughters have ever known. Johanna takes her cues from Julissa as she was her caretaker. As in any family this can be good or this can be hard!

What does being in a family look and feel like? Just imagine I asked you to consider what does it feel and look like to live in an orphanage. It's only a concept. The idea of a family is dreamy, fairy tale in some ways. Just as imagining living in an orphanage is scary, sad, lonely, etc. We don't really know what it means until we live it. Transitions are hard, especially when they are fairy tale concepts.

This is the case for our daughters. What do families do? What do they look like? How do they work? How do I get my needs met? How do I fight to survive? Who does what, when, where, why and oh yeah how mean as I experience day to day life in a family unit? Add this to living in a hotel with your new parents and you are trying to get to know each other.

Well we have seen a few glimpses into the difficulties of transitioning when living at the orphanage you did what you pleased, except for meal times. Our one daughter prefers to stay in the hotel and have her Papi buy snacks and make do. The other one, well, she is following cues. So today I am sitting in the hotel with one while Papi is at the zoo with the other. No music, no television because this is what they would prefer to do all day and all night. It is comfortable and familiar and we have allowed an abundance of this. However, we must demonstrate that this is not what families do. It does not permit interacting and getting to know each other. We are being watched during this 7 day family placement and it's like being on stage. In drama everything is exaggerated from the stage big movements, loud voices, etc. Family placement feels a bit like a performance. It is not all natural, it's forced. We need to provide pictures of activities and explain our time. Well when you adopt older children who have cared for themselves and you are trying to make sure your time is accounted for in ways that are pleasing to powers that be, your left with no choice but to make it happen. We would like our daughters to get to know us and us them. We will over time, it may just require having to undo when we were hopeful to do it from the start. It's not about us it's about these two precious girls, scared and learning what it is to be a family.

So I startd the post earlier and as I return to add photos I am happy to report that or evening was a happy fun one with all 4 of us on the bed, skyping with counsins, aunties, and grammy.  The girls love to see themselves on the computer and warmed up with each call, not wanting them to end.  Followed by watching the good ole Charlie bit my finger clip, 10 times, and chatting.

Grief is like rain, you never know when it will come.... for now we will go with the flow.  Loving these two amazing girls.

Sorry no photos...  will add later. Internet too slow.

Leaving Chincha, Orphans NO MORE!

Little sleep and a wake call at 5 am that became a ritual in Chincha, made for a long night before signing the judges order for Hogar de Paul Harris to give the girls to us! What a feeling, full of emotion as we take our daughters from the only life they have ever known. My heart was so full of JOY to take them, yet it broke my heart to watch them say goodbye to those who have cared for them and the other 65 girls. My Julissa cried and cried and wanted to be brave as the tears flowed and she quickly tried to make them go away. Johanna was hugging me and checking out the scene, no tears, she does not have the concept of what saying goodbye really means.  Saying goodbye to their big sister was the kicker for me. Know that when we discovered they had siblings we inquired about what we could do. In Peru children need an abandonment decree to before they can even be considered.  If a grandmother visits every couple of months or so that is good enough. We want to help her and we are open to all possible options to make this happen.

Orphans NO MORE!!!!

Off to the bus station to catch the 3 hour ride back to Lima to sign the family placement papers. Then to the hotel. Let's just say we were all tired and we started out for some lunch and the girls were asking to just sleep. Ben went to get some sandwiches and brought them to the room. By this time we had tears for a friend left behind. They are both from the same city and have been home siblings and best friends.  Later we tried on clothes and discovered Johanna's all fit and Julissa well she was a bit more choosier and some didn't fit. She became very concerned and wanted to go shopping for more. It was shortly after we said yes that I became violently ill. Pretty sure it was my lunch. Oh.My. was I sick. More tears as we had to tell Julissa we couldn't go shopping. I could not move and I needed to be close to facilities. I napped in between trips to the bathroom and heard Papi and the girls laughing and playing. They think he is a riot. They love to say, Mama, Papi is crazy! When they speak to me they just yell in Spanish, like it will make sense if they are louder. Johanna is saying, please, thank you, sorry, and understanding some direction from me. Julissa loves to say crazy, but is self conscious with her English and says Papi Mama, Papi. This means we will get him to translate.

Woke up this morning feeling much better but very weak. Had a special tea that is not legal in the US because of it's origin but it helped and it is legal here. Off to the store for shopping as promised and learned my daughter has a very definite taste.

We didnt nap. We laid low, but I gave Julissa a manicure by soaking her hands in the sink and rubbing them with Burts Bees Cream. She loved it as she smiled and said awe as I washed them off with very warm water. Next came some curling iron action, while Papi and Johanna rough housed.  Is she ever quick witted.  Oh My!  Oh lets not forget Beiber boy blarring in the background.  They left the orphanage with a gift of a bootleg version of that boy!

Day 1 of 7 of family placement is coming to a close.  Papi was wonderful with them as yesterday.  I could not have asked for a better Papi for these two girls.  

It is with each activity that we get just a little deeper glimpse into what life has been like for them. We are modeling family and although they are cautious they are willing to try.

Thank you for all the comments and emails.  Please know that we have read them and smiled, we just can not reply to each one.

Now, I will give this information, because we have been asked multiple times.  The girls sizes, appear to be 6 and 10 slim, spending on the store.  Shoe sizes are 13 and 5.  They love music and dancing, they don't really have toys.  I did bring them somethings and they look at them and place them on the shelf above their bed.  Johanna's baby doll, named Tracy and her My Little Pony (Pinkie Pie) that she has named Benjamin.  :)  We are sharing because we have been asked and not because we are asking.  We are thankful for all of you.  Thank you for sharing in the blessing of 2 precious girls who are Orphans No More!

Seven Motortaxis, Two buses and Goodbyes

Wow our day started early, we arrived at the orphanage @ 8am. I kissed my sweet girls in the cafeteria and said good morning and I let them know Papi was staying and I would be back for lunch. They were stoic and nearly unresponsive and I reported this upon leaving and jumping into our taxi with our rep. Oh she says, yes they have very strike rules it is not you. They were so restrained that I honestly didn't think it was but I had to share.

Off we went to catch a bus to Canete to see the judge to hand in the official documents that state the adoption process has begun. A motor taxi to the judge, check. A motor taxi to the civil registrar, check, than another back to the bus. You get it 7 motor taxis and 2 buses later we arrived back at the hotel in Chincha. We were her 5 minutes and I heard my girls. They both saw me and came running, Mama. Ben will post about his morning with the girls that included chocolate cake at 9:30 in the morning, shoe shopping and one last outfit (because well, Julissa liked it).

Eggs waiting for the bus... no tractor trailers here

The girls wanted another trip the pool so into the pool. Papi taught Julissa some swim strokes, we played, and just basked in our together time. Johanna does not like her Papi to be out of her sight. He is her personal playground and playmate. He is a great Papi and I am so proud of him. Time to get out of the water for a quick lunch so we could return to the orphanage and Johanna said, no I don't want a party I will just stay here. She got the eye from the orphanage SW and I just approached her with my hands out, palms down and said let's go my little one and she jumped in my arms.

Julissa loves to be in our hotel room and planning what comes next. She organized their clothes to take with them for tomorrow as they can not leave with any government clothes. Both of our girls have distributed what had been assigned to them to other girls in the home already. Julissa has asked both days to leave things that are hers in our room.

As we waited for the party on the bench we had many sets of eyes on us. Finally 2 girls made their way closer and closer until I got a hug around the neck from behind from the sweet girl I shared with you  on Tuesday. Before we knew it we were surrounded by a variety of age girls wanting hugs and touch. How honored I felt to be the hands that held theirs, hugged on these precious girls who long to be loved. Oh please God let these hugs and touches linger in their hearts and minds as a reminder of how loved they are. They wanted to know if we knew Hannah Montana, Justin Beiber, and Brittney Spears. Before we knew it a wind up radio appeared and good ole JB was cranked. Baby baby something something was louder sung by the girls, oh my heart.

Then onto the party that started Peru time. Yup we waited an hour and a half for the party to start and silly me was not prepared. The girls sat in chairs around the room and the caretaker who received them nearly 6 years ago spoke about how wonderful they are and how lucky and how they prayed for angels to come and give these girls a family. That was enough, the tears were flowing and they would.not.stop! M spoke on our behalf and thanked the professionals for caring for our daughters these last 6 years, told them we would care for them well and more. Their big sister gave a little speech as well in her mature manner.  I was and am so proud of her. What a gift it was to meet and share with her during this time.  The girls listened attentively and my Julissa had a hard time holding back her tears. She wants to be a family and yet her heart is so full of compassion for others and this has been been the only family she has known. The girls were so proud to hand out the gift bags they made for all the girls as well as the caregivers. Thank you Jill for the blueberry jam. It was so exciting for them to learn about what a blueberry is. They loved it! As it turns out fresh bread and jam is a popular breakfast food here.

Tomorrow morning we arrive at the orphanage for the final time at 8am, sign the order that we received the girls and off to Lima by bus to sign more papers.  These papers initiate the family placement part of the process. By law this is for the next 7 days. We will only be at the orphanage for 5 minutes as Julissa has requested we hold the taxi that brings us in the morning so we can get out quick and don't lose any time.  She also asked us if we would please pack up our suitcases tonight so we were ready in the morning.  Think she's ready for our new life together? We covet your continued prayers as we begin this next step. I feel peace about the opportunities we have had for them to say goodbye.

As Julissa kissed me goodbye for the final time she pulled back enough to make eye contact with me and said, "Hasta manana Mama..... 

We Are Family

Day 2 was wonderful. We arrived at the orphanage and Julissa y Johanna were waiting for us in the office. They greeted us with big smiles and even bigger hugs. Oh the joy we all share.

When we were initially matched we knew our daughters were 2 of 5 children, that they were the youngest of the 5 and the only 2 with abandonment decrees. We later learned that an older sister arrived at the at the orphanage about a year and a half ago with but did not have an abandonment decree. So we prepared a gift for her from the girls to give to her if she was still there and he girls were open to the idea. Yesterday they showed us her room and expressed that they did want us to meet us. We were relieved for their sake. Today we met their big sister and she is just as amazing as her sisters. She will be moving to a private orphanage where she will have access to education. I would love to share details but I want to honor our daughters story. I will tell you she too is wise beyond her years and asked us questions no 15 year old should ever have to ask. She was respectful but looking out for her sisters best interest, to know that we wanted to care for them and not have them as our maids. In the end she was relieved to meet us and see that we love them and that they love us. We are all hopeful that in time (once the are both 18) a reunion will be possible for these 3 sisters. We want to keep all possibilities open for our daughters.

We left the orphanage and went to the bakery to pick out a cake for the goodbye party. Appropriately the girls chose a princess theme. We went into the city to buy soda. Just imagine hay market square in Boston times 10 with a million taxis coming at you. Loving the opportunity to feel and experience the sights, sounds, smells, and taste of our daughters region.

We brought the girls back to our hotel to show them the clothes we had brought with us as this was a very big concern of Julissa's. We discovered this first from our phone conversation when she asked us about how she would have clothes.  There are some new girls at the orphanage and the government has not sent money for clothes. Our sweet Julissa has given a few of her very few clothes to new girls. They looked at their clothes and tried a few on, looked in the mirror and neatly folded them in their own piles. It was a gift to watch our daughters get excited.

Off to lunch for some real Peruvian food. Let me just say the food here is good! Finally we came back to our hotel where the girls put their swim suits on. they fit them like we had tried them on already, and went for a refreshing swim. After our swim we made gift bags together for the girls who will not be leaving with a forever family on Friday.

Do it again Papi, as he swung her around!

making gift bags for all their friends

Another day of discovery. Johanna told Ben that his beard really bothers her. In case your wondering he has already shaved it off. To watch her rub her arm across his scruff with both sides of her little arms and her cheek and her forehead to experience the different sensations. While Julissa played with my hair and was happy that we had the same cut.

Julissa is a planner just like her mama. She asked today to go to her school to say goodbye to her teachers and friends.  She gets it, the importance of goodbyes and the end of this chapter.  I want the goodbyes for these girls, she can not have all the ones that she desires, and for that this mama's heart breaks.

Johanna has taken to goofy faces for the camera

And finally, we are passing with flying colors, no questions necessary, to watch us is enough they say! 

Meeting the girls 2

Videos Posted by Benjamin L. Corey: Mar 8, 2011 9:08pm (6)

Meeting the girls!

Videos Posted by Benjamin L. Corey: Mar 8, 2011 7:04pm (6)#!/video/video.php?v=10150104595582582

Gotcha Day in Peru

Amazing surreal, joyous, overwhelming, spectacular, incredible, are words that come to mind, yet words are inadequate. I want to update and share the multitude of answered prayers right before our eyes so bare with me as I just write.

I have prayed since before we were matched that God would prepare the hearts of our children for us and us for them. Let me try to give you a glimpse of what this was today.
We arrived and we walked through the big locked wall enclosing the whole orphanage and we heard, "there they are" and as we looked beyond a few girls and staff we could see our daughters waving to us through barred windows where they waited for us in the locked common living area. We lost it as we waved they waved we waved more and they did too. We were wisked into an an office with multiple adults speaking Spanish faster than my greatest rate of speech. I turned to Ben and said, what is going on babe and he said honey I can't make anything out. They moved us to another side room where they quickly brought the most amazing girls to us. They had hugs and kisses just as they promised on the phone and then they asked us if they could leave with us right away.

We shared many special moments as the girls checked us out. Just let me tell you that I was blown away at how they interacted with us, touched us, smelled us, outlined our faces with their precious little hands. They interacted with us like we have been together. They asked questions and shared freely about themselves and their lives. They gave us a tour of every square inch of the orphanage. They wanted to share their food with us, they wanted to feed it to us. Their desire to know us and to let us begin to know them was incredible.  No walls, no guarding, just 2 little girls who have lived in an orphanage for nearly six years whose hearts are ready.  Johanna said Mama, I prayed and prayed for you to come, thank you Mama , I love you.  Julissa shared after all this waiting we had a really first good day with you.

Lil Miss Johanna doing a dance for her Papi and Mama.  Sweet Julissa laughing at her goofy and silly abilities.

There were some very sobering moments as we loved on our daughters and other girls looked on through the windows. Our hearts broke. While one little girl looked at my necklace and bracelet that have both of my daughters name on it and read them aloud and said me too! As she asked if they would be back in a year to visit and as she told Ben she wants to go to the United States too. As she turned to me for hugs and comfort as she cried at the loss of her friends. How I wish I could tell her I will be her mommy too.

Jessica, we love you and we will do all we can for you. Our girl comforting her friend. 

Words escape me and we are exhausted. Thank you all for the love support and prayers.  Your prayers do not return void.

Guest Blogger ~ Tia Tarsha

Tomorrow my sister Tracy and brother in law Ben will meet their daughters, my nieces Julissa (12) and Johanna (8). This won’t happen the usual way parents 'meet' their children, such as on an ultrasound machine at 20 weeks gestation or in a hospital room with doctors and nurses after being pregnant for nine months. Tracy and Ben will travel to an orphanage in Chincha, Peru where the sisters have lived for nearly 6 years. This isn't a story of the American dream family where the 2.5 children come as babies and live happily ever after with a white picket fence. This is a story of God’s love. This is a story of His idea of a perfectly planned family and His plans for us to be His hands and feet here on earth. This is the story of adoption. And let me tell you, IT.WASN’T. EASY! Being ‘paper pregnant’ for longer than an elephant is pregnant (22 months) wasn’t comfortable, waiting months and months for an unspecified date wasn’t exciting, and relying on humans in 2 countries to process paperwork wasn’t reassuring in the least. But God doesn’t call us to be comfortable, excited and reassured all the time. He calls us to seek Him in everything and know that he is God. I have watched as Ben and Tracy did this, and I am so amazed that tomorrow they will see and touch His work!


When I think of their 800+ days of waiting, planning, waiting, paying (in time and money) for agency mistakes, waiting, praying and OH, MORE waiting, I am in disbelief that it will all come to fruition tomorrow! I know the many tears shed, anxiety and fear filled days and feelings of a huge weight on their shoulders will all be worth it when they get to put their arms around their daughters and hold them! I long to be a fly on the wall and for there to be a video camera to capture it all, but mostly I just want there to be a peace for all four of them that surpasses all understanding and a bond created immediately. I want the girls to feel elated and safe and for their parents to become free of all the adversities they have faced in the past 2+ years. God can do this!


I will travel to Lima, Peru on March 19 with my Dad to meet Julissa and Johanna. I can't even imagine what this will be like. I have met a niece and 3 nephews as newborns and fallen in love immediately. And while I have fallen in love with Julissa and Johanna through pictures and stories of phone conversations with their parents, what will it be like to meet them in their country at 12 and 8 years of age? How will they know I love them? Will they love me? These girls were orphans for years, but all along God knew they would be my nieces, and Tracy and Ben's daughters. I can't fathom the depth of His plans for the future, but I know God has orchestrated the events of tomorrow and the rest of our tomorrows, and I know it will be more than I could ever ask for or imagine.

Dear God,
Thank you for being infallible and overwhelmingly generous. Today I Thank you specifically for our Peruvian Princesses. Thank you that the uncomfortable wait is finally over and we get to be with them. Please prepare them like only You can for tomorrow and the next few months as they adjust to family life in America. Be with their parents as they enter uncharted territory. Be with them as they travel and communicate in these early days. Let the journey be smooth and memorable for all of them and reveal Yourself so all the glory will be Yours! Lord I pray for more uncomfortable times like these have been so we can be drawn closer to You. I know tomorrow will be just as You see fit and we will be completely amazed!
~Tia Tarsha~

At Last

We went to the Embassy this morning to hear our file was being reviewed still. We were disappointed to say the least. We walked away and all I could say under my breathe is what I have been saying all weekend. "I trust you God, even though I do not understand." I had to surrender for sanity sake and I did experience peace over the weekend. Today was long as we waited for Marisa to contact the Embassy as she had previously told us our file had been reviewed and the letter just needed to be written. The call just came that the Article 5 (the letter the Embassy issues) was written and at the SNA. (secretary of national adoption). So we have the green light to be united with our daughters. THANK YOU GOD!!!!!!
We are waiting for the confirmation call that the psychologist that needs to observe our initial meeting can travel. I will update later tonight.

UPDATE: we received the final confirmation that the Psychologist is available to travel and WE WILL MEET OUR DAUGHTERS tomorrow March 8th 2011.

We have already started saying our last.

Our last Monday without our daughters
Our last night to sleep without having met our daughters.
Our last date night before parenthood
Our last walk through Parque Kennedy without the girls.
Our last night as our family being Ben, Tracy and Saige
Our last, you get it so many last as tomorrow we begin the list of FIRST with these 2 precious girls. We are beyond excited, happy, scared, humbled, grateful and overwhelmed.

Thank you ALL for your prayers, support, and encouragement as we have journey the past 803 days. We welcome you to stay with us as we begin this next chapter. Adoption is a beautiful gift given to all 4 of us and yet we recognize that it doesn't come without a cost.

The Weekend of Waiting

Sorry no update last night.  We went on a tour of Lima and to the catacombs yesterday and my sun to water intake turned up insufficient.  So I just needed to sleep away the headache after consuming more water.  I am going to try and upload a few pictures to share.  The wifi here just isn't fast enough for images sometimes.

Ben's pineapple juice, just for you Tarsh, its a tiny pitcher

My fruit bowl.  YUMMY!!!

Paintings in Parque Kennedy, Miraflores

Street entertainers juggling and doing flip over one another for money

 The tour was suppose to be bilingual.  Our guide shared alot of information in Spanish and a tiny bit in Spanglish.  Its ok, I enjoyed the sightseeing and got the general idea.

This is Lima....  driving in Boston is courteous in comparison.  The picture only minimally captures the significance of the housing stacked into this mountain community.

I love this.  No horns in the presidential district.  Horns are a regular part of driving here.  I have started to identify the variations in beeps and it doesn't require me to turn my head.  Thus far, there is the taxi beep every 10 seconds, "do you want a ride? Then the I am coming,  don't move.  The get out of my way I don't want to wait for traffic or people crossing the street.  Hey wait its my turn, you stop.  Stay tuned, the days in Peru have just begun, perhaps I will share more.